Top Road Dogs of 2012

Another year coming to a close, a year of shredded tires littering the highway like shrapnel from a rubber armageddon, a year of forlorn rockers neglecting dipsticks, putting out van fires, getting towed, towing old vans, and white knuckle pull overs on freeways all over the country. White Mystery would like to honor those that risk their lives and sanity to bring the good gospel of Rock n Roll to your quaint, sleepy, little burgs.

Turbo Fruits

Jesus Christ, these guys must have lapped the perimeter of the country at least four times over this year and gone through at least that many vans along the way. At one point they bought a new van to tow their old broken down van to their next show only to end up breaking down again. I’m pretty sure they also lost both sets of keys. God damn, see you in the crazy lands beyond, brothers!

Guantanamo Baywatch

Gosh diddely darn it, these bruisers tour their band into the fucking ground every single time the step foot out of Portland, and they keep on trucking. There comes a certain”make or break” point in every bands career when the electrifying highs wear off and the soul crushing lows creep in, and if you make it past that point you form an unshakable unity with your band normally reserved for Sailers and Gypsies, but Guantanamo has those moments about once a week. I remember hearing that their van broke down at some trailer park in god knows where Kentucky, they spent the night with crack smoking juggalos only to have their guitarist suffer an allergic reaction to moonshine. They bought a pickup truck with a hardshell on the back from the juggalos and finished the rest of their tour with it. Who does that sort of shit?

The Pharmacy 

These guys crushed the states and Europe this year, as well as playing the 1600th show in their career!

It’s a dangerous life on the road, we end up having only our peers to look to for inspiration and strength, it’s comforting to know that we’re not the only smelly weirdos selling our wares from town to town. Support rock music! Buy merch! Check these bands out next time they come to town because they are the humble servants of rock and roll, and they need gas money, dammit.

Honorable mention to Heavy Times, Outer Minds, and anyone else that bought a worn out lemon of a van just to make it to Austin for SXSW. Last but not least we have the Obnox whose van actually exploded this year. WOOF WOOF!

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